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finefoxyladiesLast night's Psych: I'm not one to turn my nose up at a myriad of lyric jokes (including one that included "lyrical gangsta"), '80s fashion jokes, and a confused Gina Gershon calling Lassiter "Mr. Bean" and "Tony Randall," but...the characterizations seemed off. Both Gus and Lassiter were nearly as WACKY!!! as Shawn, which was weird.
However, Tim Curry was, as always, deeeeee-lightful.
When last we left off, Dan, trailing ducklings, headed out to the thoroughfare to meet Cap'n Turner:
Taking Dan's note to "come scare him" seriously, Captain Turner appears looking scary.
Dudes are kind of cool sometimes. Without words, they can take off their gun belt and make a "Come and get it, bitch" gesture, and it's just so macho.
*trumpets play "Reveille"*
Monet's famous painting Fighting Water Lillies du Eye Gouging.
Adams and Johnny look on.
...
I'm sorry, but Adams is just so very hot. I can't stop looking at this picture. He's SO HOT.
Also, the gal peeking over Adams' shoulder is pretty funny. I think we can all identify with her by the end of the fight. Wish I'd had some tall, lanky dude to hide behind and then later on, underneath...
Here comes the architect of this little gore-a-thon, The-Jagoff-The-Earth-Talks-To, George Hearst.
Albert Swearengen, a few moments later. Whether hesitating to make the last entrance or afraid to see Dan getting the snot beat out of him, we are not sure.
*grappling* It's not going so well for Dan, all said...
Al, gripping the banister, prepares to resign himself to a life without Dority...
(sorry, but apparently, I missed the bitchin' closeup of Al's face when you know he's lost all hope...I suck)
I know![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
morganaus wasn't impressed with it, but I have to quote The Big Lebowski here:
"Where's the money, Lebowski? Where's the money, shithead?"
"It's down there somewhere, let me have another look."
Dan's had his head bashed into a rock a few times and is probably seconds from passing out from lack of oxygen, but he manages to get a hand up and a finger in...
Monet's lesser-known work Dangly Eye in Deadwood Thoroughfare in Spring.
Let's put the gore into relief here:
Eesh.
This is why making screenshots is interesting: I had never noticed Blazanov and Merrick in the background of this scene. Dude, like they didn't have a crappy enough day going on. Poor Blazanov is going to have Josh Lyman levels of PTSD. Sirens all over his damn building.
"Tag! You're it!"
"Mr. Hearst."
"Oh, balls."
"Dad?"
"FINISH HIM!" /Mortal Kombat
(Actually, the nod is so subtle as to almost not have happened at all.)
"HADOUKEN!"
Seriously, I think Al, at this point, is thinking "Between post-fight Dan and the inevitable fallout, this situation is going to be a pain in my ass."
We segue from the end of Deadwood Street Fighter II to...the theater troupe? I'm sorry, but it's bah. A lot of the inner workings, dynamics, in-fighting, Bellegarde being a prissy flamer. Worth noting only because of Richardson's "Neato!" expression while watching the strangers:
Ha ha ha ha ha!
Doc! Yay! He's come to see Dan and make sure Dan isn't smashing highball glasses or freaking out at POTUS (dude, I can't help it: referencing that ep of TWW brings joy into my life)
"If Dan's got a broken rib poking into his lung, I probably should do something about it, y'all."
I don't know what to make of this. Submissions accepted. I could go with my usual "He's so hot," but...
Anywho, Johnny heads in to Dan's room to tell Dan the doc's here to give him a check-up:
Dan takes the "please remove your pants" step a bit too far. Then refuses to see the doctor. Weird, eh?
PTSD. I'm tellin' ya.
"Well, if he turns blue and/or starts hemorrhaging, you know who to call. Know what I sayin'?"
"Thanks, Doc. Also, have you noticed how how I am? Is there a cure for me?"
"Jessie, enough with the ogling of Adams." *silent concern for Dan AND Doc*
Across town, Alma, descending further still into addiction, decides she's deep enough into this to offer herself in a marital-duty way to Ellsworth, regardless of how she herself feels inside. Milch, in the Stories of the Black Hills book of awesome, basically says that Alma's at the point where she's all, "What's fucking one more dude I don't love? Ain't no thang." Which is pretty sad...as you can see:
From that marital tragedy to a relationship where sex is less of a problem than communication:
Hi, Sol and Trixie. Anyway, Trixie is beating around the bush (NO PUN) regarding Alma's backslide and Sol, confused by the fact that Trixie isn't screaming at him like a howler monkey, doesn't really get her broad "HINT HINT HINT"ing.
So, worn down by her attempts to talk, Trixie backslides into the bad habit she knows best: substituting sex for uncomfortable moments. "Would you like to fuck?"
At last, words Sol understands. "Yes, please!" And really, typing it out doesn't do it justice. Hawkes' delivery is super smugly perky.
Back at the Ellsworth house, Alma is asking said question a little more subtly:
Just when you think consummation and success is not far away:
Ellsworth opens his eyes and really looks at his wife. What follows is...just so depressing. These are two good people who are in this situation, and both think they are doing what's right, and there's wounded pride and lack of understanding and...it just sucks, okay. Sucks.
And here's the worst of it: Ellsworth not only plans to move out, he wounds Alma where she is weakest--Sofia--by reminding her not to "forget" Sofia at school. Oy.
Finally, Alma begins to realize what is at stake:
Alma'sfuture husband #3 one-time-nemesis, Al, is experiencing a similar internal crisis: knowing that Dan is shaken, but also knowing that he will not be able to reach him right away, stands impotent (uh, not like the kind he has later in the season). Johnny asks, as gently as he knows how, that Al visit Dan. Al explains why this death was different:
"A fair fight, something Dan and I have always struggled to avoid, is different. You see the light go out of their eyes... It's just you left and death."
Knowing nothing of this crisis of conscience, but having a human moment just the same, Hearst goes to the Bella Union to mourn Captain Turner:
"Hello. I'm Beezelbub. But you might know me as Douchey-McGee-That-The-Earth-Talks-To. Wanna shake my hand and pretend you feel sorry for me?"
"Hey, man, I'm employed by Tolliver: all in a day's work."
Across the way, Seth Bullock's day has not improved: Hostetler, driven to the brink of madness by a lifetime of social oppression and, most recently, close personal contact with Steve the Drunk (which was probably worse than slavery and racial discrimination combined), has committed suicide. Seth, his willingness to listen to Al shot to shit by a day's worth of frustration, is now looking for Hearst, determined to get his rage on no matter what the cost.
"Hey, Farnum. Where is Hearst?"
"I don't know?"
*RAGE SWITCH SET TO TOTAL FUCKING DESTRUCTION*
Not surprisingly, Farnum protests too much while giving up Hearst's whereabouts.
And probably wets his pants.
Good times. Great friends. Budweiser.
Only replace "Great friends" with "amoral a-holes."
Enter Seth Bullock, who immediately gets backsass from Hearst about being "put on notice":
"Mr. Hearst, you sound drunk."
"Suck my balls,Mr. Garrison Sheriff Bullock."
"Buh-SCUSE me?"
"I said..." *gets out megaphone* "SUCK. MY. BALLS. SHERIFF. BULLOCK."
[actually, it's all "Fuck you!" but you get the picture]
Seth does not take kindly to this sassery at the end of his no-good, very-bad day:
And in what is the best moment of preternatural calm Bullock ever displays...
"Fuck...you."
Meanwhile, Al gets some air:
"Hum-de-dum-dum-dum. Well, at least the day is over. Like Scarlett O'Hara said, 'Tomorrow is another day.' Lalalalala...oh, for the LOVE..."
"Dude. I am calling Social Services tomorrow. This kid is nothing but trouble...
Also, I am so effing screwed."
Another resident of Deadwood who has a shitty day, Mr. Merrick takes in the scene:
"Holy shit, dude."
"Hey, Merrick."
"Holy SHIT, dude!"
"Brother, don't I know it. Also, you may want to push that five-part series about No. 10's new barstools back a few issues..."
Hearst: "Dude, you are so very fucked."
Bullock: "...Man, I am going to get a big ol' talking-to from Dad, aren't I?"
Well, there it is. Making one of these things from one's own screencaps is a lot of work! I am so impressed by peeps who do this on a regular basis. I'm especially in awe ofmspooh, who used to do huge The Unit picspams. Which must have seemed like a big ol' punishment at times. I mean, this is Deadwood. It's fun, even when it's grody (CON STAPLETON).
And because I can, I leave you with The Surround Sound Salmon-Colored Undadrawer Experience:
Yes. Yes, ma'am.
However, Tim Curry was, as always, deeeeee-lightful.
When last we left off, Dan, trailing ducklings, headed out to the thoroughfare to meet Cap'n Turner:
Taking Dan's note to "come scare him" seriously, Captain Turner appears looking scary.
Dudes are kind of cool sometimes. Without words, they can take off their gun belt and make a "Come and get it, bitch" gesture, and it's just so macho.
*trumpets play "Reveille"*
Monet's famous painting Fighting Water Lillies du Eye Gouging.
Adams and Johnny look on.
...
I'm sorry, but Adams is just so very hot. I can't stop looking at this picture. He's SO HOT.
Also, the gal peeking over Adams' shoulder is pretty funny. I think we can all identify with her by the end of the fight. Wish I'd had some tall, lanky dude to hide behind and then later on, underneath...
Here comes the architect of this little gore-a-thon, The-Jagoff-The-Earth-Talks-To, George Hearst.
Albert Swearengen, a few moments later. Whether hesitating to make the last entrance or afraid to see Dan getting the snot beat out of him, we are not sure.
*grappling* It's not going so well for Dan, all said...
Al, gripping the banister, prepares to resign himself to a life without Dority...
(sorry, but apparently, I missed the bitchin' closeup of Al's face when you know he's lost all hope...I suck)
I know
morganaus wasn't impressed with it, but I have to quote The Big Lebowski here:"Where's the money, Lebowski? Where's the money, shithead?"
"It's down there somewhere, let me have another look."
Dan's had his head bashed into a rock a few times and is probably seconds from passing out from lack of oxygen, but he manages to get a hand up and a finger in...
Monet's lesser-known work Dangly Eye in Deadwood Thoroughfare in Spring.
Let's put the gore into relief here:
Eesh.
This is why making screenshots is interesting: I had never noticed Blazanov and Merrick in the background of this scene. Dude, like they didn't have a crappy enough day going on. Poor Blazanov is going to have Josh Lyman levels of PTSD. Sirens all over his damn building.
"Tag! You're it!"
"Mr. Hearst."
"Oh, balls."
"Dad?"
"FINISH HIM!" /Mortal Kombat
(Actually, the nod is so subtle as to almost not have happened at all.)
"HADOUKEN!"
Seriously, I think Al, at this point, is thinking "Between post-fight Dan and the inevitable fallout, this situation is going to be a pain in my ass."
We segue from the end of Deadwood Street Fighter II to...the theater troupe? I'm sorry, but it's bah. A lot of the inner workings, dynamics, in-fighting, Bellegarde being a prissy flamer. Worth noting only because of Richardson's "Neato!" expression while watching the strangers:
Ha ha ha ha ha!
Doc! Yay! He's come to see Dan and make sure Dan isn't smashing highball glasses or freaking out at POTUS (dude, I can't help it: referencing that ep of TWW brings joy into my life)
"If Dan's got a broken rib poking into his lung, I probably should do something about it, y'all."
I don't know what to make of this. Submissions accepted. I could go with my usual "He's so hot," but...
Anywho, Johnny heads in to Dan's room to tell Dan the doc's here to give him a check-up:
Dan takes the "please remove your pants" step a bit too far. Then refuses to see the doctor. Weird, eh?
PTSD. I'm tellin' ya.
"Well, if he turns blue and/or starts hemorrhaging, you know who to call. Know what I sayin'?"
"Thanks, Doc. Also, have you noticed how how I am? Is there a cure for me?"
Across town, Alma, descending further still into addiction, decides she's deep enough into this to offer herself in a marital-duty way to Ellsworth, regardless of how she herself feels inside. Milch, in the Stories of the Black Hills book of awesome, basically says that Alma's at the point where she's all, "What's fucking one more dude I don't love? Ain't no thang." Which is pretty sad...as you can see:
From that marital tragedy to a relationship where sex is less of a problem than communication:
Hi, Sol and Trixie. Anyway, Trixie is beating around the bush (NO PUN) regarding Alma's backslide and Sol, confused by the fact that Trixie isn't screaming at him like a howler monkey, doesn't really get her broad "HINT HINT HINT"ing.
So, worn down by her attempts to talk, Trixie backslides into the bad habit she knows best: substituting sex for uncomfortable moments. "Would you like to fuck?"
At last, words Sol understands. "Yes, please!" And really, typing it out doesn't do it justice. Hawkes' delivery is super smugly perky.
Back at the Ellsworth house, Alma is asking said question a little more subtly:
Just when you think consummation and success is not far away:
Ellsworth opens his eyes and really looks at his wife. What follows is...just so depressing. These are two good people who are in this situation, and both think they are doing what's right, and there's wounded pride and lack of understanding and...it just sucks, okay. Sucks.
And here's the worst of it: Ellsworth not only plans to move out, he wounds Alma where she is weakest--Sofia--by reminding her not to "forget" Sofia at school. Oy.
Finally, Alma begins to realize what is at stake:
Alma's
"A fair fight, something Dan and I have always struggled to avoid, is different. You see the light go out of their eyes... It's just you left and death."
Knowing nothing of this crisis of conscience, but having a human moment just the same, Hearst goes to the Bella Union to mourn Captain Turner:
"Hello. I'm Beezelbub. But you might know me as Douchey-McGee-That-The-Earth-Talks-To. Wanna shake my hand and pretend you feel sorry for me?"
"Hey, man, I'm employed by Tolliver: all in a day's work."
Across the way, Seth Bullock's day has not improved: Hostetler, driven to the brink of madness by a lifetime of social oppression and, most recently, close personal contact with Steve the Drunk (which was probably worse than slavery and racial discrimination combined), has committed suicide. Seth, his willingness to listen to Al shot to shit by a day's worth of frustration, is now looking for Hearst, determined to get his rage on no matter what the cost.
"Hey, Farnum. Where is Hearst?"
"I don't know?"
*RAGE SWITCH SET TO TOTAL FUCKING DESTRUCTION*
Not surprisingly, Farnum protests too much while giving up Hearst's whereabouts.
And probably wets his pants.
Good times. Great friends. Budweiser.
Only replace "Great friends" with "amoral a-holes."
Enter Seth Bullock, who immediately gets backsass from Hearst about being "put on notice":
"Mr. Hearst, you sound drunk."
"Suck my balls,
"Buh-SCUSE me?"
"I said..." *gets out megaphone* "SUCK. MY. BALLS. SHERIFF. BULLOCK."
[actually, it's all "Fuck you!" but you get the picture]
Seth does not take kindly to this sassery at the end of his no-good, very-bad day:
And in what is the best moment of preternatural calm Bullock ever displays...
"Fuck...you."
Meanwhile, Al gets some air:
"Hum-de-dum-dum-dum. Well, at least the day is over. Like Scarlett O'Hara said, 'Tomorrow is another day.' Lalalalala...oh, for the LOVE..."
"Dude. I am calling Social Services tomorrow. This kid is nothing but trouble...
Also, I am so effing screwed."
Another resident of Deadwood who has a shitty day, Mr. Merrick takes in the scene:
"Holy shit, dude."
"Hey, Merrick."
"Holy SHIT, dude!"
"Brother, don't I know it. Also, you may want to push that five-part series about No. 10's new barstools back a few issues..."
Hearst: "Dude, you are so very fucked."
Bullock: "...Man, I am going to get a big ol' talking-to from Dad, aren't I?"
Well, there it is. Making one of these things from one's own screencaps is a lot of work! I am so impressed by peeps who do this on a regular basis. I'm especially in awe of
mspooh, who used to do huge The Unit picspams. Which must have seemed like a big ol' punishment at times. I mean, this is Deadwood. It's fun, even when it's grody (CON STAPLETON).And because I can, I leave you with The Surround Sound Salmon-Colored Undadrawer Experience:
Yes. Yes, ma'am.